1.First, the Pikliz. This is the stuff you're gonna put on the griot to make it really happen. Chop up the cabbage, dice the onions, and julienne the carrots. You can dice up some shallot and green or red peppers if you wanna use those too. Stick them all in a jar along with the cloves, a teaspoon of salt, and a scotch bonnet. Heat the vinegar until it starts to simmer, then pour that in the jar as well. Tighten the lid, let it sit for 48 hours, and you're golden. Next, the rice. Soak the mushrooms in a small bowl of warm water for half an hour, just enough to cover the mushrooms. It will both smell and look like a bowl of dirt. This is ok. Strain the mushrooms and KEEP THE WATER. That's where all the flavor is, and it's also where you get that cool, dark color in the rice. Pick out any bits of dirt that are at the bottom of the bowl. Heat the oil in a medium pot on medium-high, and mince the garlic, red pepper, and a tablespoon of onion. Throw them in the pot and let them saute for a couple of minutes, then add the black dirt-water and simmer for about 15 minutes. Strain the water again, setting the vegetables aside. Add chicken broth to the water until you have enough for the rice, then cook it for as long as the little package says. Fluff the rice with a fork, stir in the mushrooms, a scotch bonnet, and the other vegetables you just cooked, and let the rice sit on super-low heat while you cook up everything else. Next, the good stuff: pork. Cut up the pork into bite-sized chunks, about half an inch square. Squeeze the citrus in a medium-sized bowl and toss the pork in the juice. Put the pork in a container or plastic bag, add the herbs, spices, and a tablespoon of salt, and toss. Let it marinate overnight. After the pork's done marinating, throw it in a big pot and cover with water. Boil it on medium-high until all the water evaporates; it should take around an hour. Normally I'm vehemently against boiling any kind of meat, but after that long-ass monologue up ther